"...it's like Will Rogers, Jean Shepherd and some grumpy Jewish man all rolled into one."

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Things You Never Want To Hear @ Work

  • "That meeting started an hour ago."
  • "Random drug testing is today?"
  • "Why did my email to the CEO bounce back as 'undeliverable'?"
  • "HR wants to see you."
  • "Our best days are ahead."
  • "Would you mind showing the temp everything you've been doing?"
  • "Did anyone else have trouble cashing their paycheck?"
  • "Would you mind copying your files into this network folder?"
  • "Nobody's seen the boss for, like, a week!"
  • "Good news - you don't have to bother filling out your performance evaluation."
  • "The stock price isn't important."
  • "We've got a lot of residual good will with these people."
  • "Why doesn't my code let me into the building?"
  • "My spreadsheets are automatically backed up when I turn off my computer, aren't they?"
  • "At least I know my job is safe."
  • "Where'd all the copiers go?"
  • "Nothing is going to change."
  • "Did you mean to hit 'Reply-All'?"
  • "That's just a rumor."
  • "I didn't know the Board of Directors was meeting today."
  • "Hey, where's my monitor and desk lamp?"

1 comment:

  1. This is hilarious because it's (unfortunately) true. You can't make this stuff up.